When They Begin The Overture They Start To End The Show

The year is barreling along, and the end of the summer is looming. I know, summer’s not even officially here yet, as evidenced by the outdoor temperature hovering below 100 degrees. Even so, it is hot enough for multiple showers a day (I SO wish we had a pool!), fans blowing directly on me, and antiperspirant that pretty much just says, “Fuck you.” This means our electric bill will be ridiculously high, and we are constantly on the brink of dehydration. People tend to forget that this city used to be a desert not all that long ago.

Matt is taking the summer off from school and concentrating on work and music. He texted me some fabulous lyrics a few nights ago, so I’m interested to see where he goes with them. I wish he would work on some instrumental songs, as he is supremely talented at it, but creativity works best when stretched, like a muscle. While we still plan to build him a new bed, next week we’re going to paint his apartment and install shelves. I think I’ve managed to talk him into a neutral palette of navy and grey, with red accents. He wants grown up and sophisticated, modern and minimal. I can pull that off in my sleep. He can use dark colors because he doesn’t have any animals. Ron hates our navy blue sheets because they show every speck of cat hair, so I think Matt will inherit them.

Aubrey is counting down the days until we leave, in spite of us still waiting on her financial aid package. The question still remains; western New York, or Massachusetts? We won’t know for a few more weeks, and I’m starting to feel that anxiety in my stomach. Much more of this and I’ll have to up my Klonopin until that damn letter gets here.

She still has a few months of work left and desperately needed new shoes. She’d literally walked her old shoes to nothing. I talked her out of a crappy pair of Payless shoes and had her go try on some SAS shoes. She loved them, but wasn’t thrilled with the price. Yesterday, we went up to the outlet mall only to find out that they don’t really have an outlet, other than at the factory which is about 20 minutes from our house, as opposed to the hour it takes to get to the outlet. She didn’t care, and didn’t want to wait, so she bought them at full price. Her coworkers were horrified at the expense, but when she got home this evening, she was quite happy. Her knees and back didn’t hurt, and neither did her feet. She deemed them worth every penny, and since she takes great care of her clothes and shoes, they will last her for a very long time. Most people don’t know about SAS because they don’t advertise, but they are the best shoes made in the US. They are fantastic for flat feet because of the arch support, and they have plenty of cushion. The inner soles are removeable for washing, and can be replaced when they wear out.

While we were at the outlet, we walked past NY&Co, and I saw some cute t-shirts through the window. We went in, and while I ended up not getting those shirts, I did see some black button downs. Aubrey’s been wearing a boys size 10 button down, which fits everywhere except for the arm length. These shirts are short sleeved, and came in extra small, so they actually fit her, and she’ll be cooler under her blazer. With her all black suit and shoes, she’s perfectly outfitted to work in New York, should she choose.

I am still trying to squeeze in quality time before she’s gone. Last Tuesday was really nice because I spent the afternoon with both kids. We went to lunch and Matt recorded Aubrey singing; she sounded great, but the background music was dreadful. We’ll try again after Matt gets his new software and some new monitors.

It’s a strange feeling to see them so grown up. It’s like it happened overnight, but I blinked and I missed it. Somehow Matt went from being a mess to being a responsible student who is gainfully employed. Aubrey is this uber-confident young woman who is comfortable in her own skin, making new friends easily, and generally running her own life. I know this means I am a successful parent whose done her job well, but every now and again, I miss the mess and noise and angst. Our house was “the house” where everyone hung out, watched movies, spent the night…now it’s too quiet, and it’s only going to get more so.



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